Any tips on preventing a sore ass?
  • Now I'm not kidding.... I'm sure some of the veteran couriers have got some tips on how to prevent a sore ass, aside from the obvious; wash every day, cotton boxers, stop taking it up the ass from shitty companies.

    Today I made the mistake of wearing a pair of padded shorts without underwear. At about four o clock my ass cheeks started to burn. By 7 I could no longer sit in the saddle OR walk.
  • If you're using conventional cycling shorts, you should be using some sort of chammy cream, or just vaseline, otherwise you get chafing, and then sores. If 'proper' cycling shorts don't work for you, don't use them. My gf rides a lot, and never uses cycling shorts, even on 100km rides, and doesn't report any unusual soreness.

    Me, on the other hand, I have always had to use cycling shorts (and lots of cream) for any ride longer than 20k, and even then my arse sometimes get ripped to shreds. When I was on the road, I had 5 prs of shorts, so I was wearing clean everyday etc etc. Even then, I still used to get cysts, sores & boils. After I quit messengering, I bought 1 really good pair of shorts (Assos F1 Mille), for racing, sportives & general riding and washed them every night if I was touring etc. Worth every penny of the £100+ I spent, and had less grief.
  • Dont wear pants
  • I like to smear the labia labium of my posterior orifice with a soothing cream to relive the inflamation caused by activities of furious bicyclism. Suitable topical applications can be purchased without prescription from a purveyour of pharmaceutical particulaurs.
  • Equally important is post-ride care: wash, dry & talc.

    This thread is conjuring some rank images.
  • Like the late Red Fox used to say. "You gota wash your ass."
  • babywipes
  • Assos Chamoix! Loob that bum of yours...and eh, wash it ocasionally!
  • Maybe change your sadle. The best investment you can make.
  • I found removing the chamois so that the lycra could breathe efficiently and dry quickly in the wet, and going commando for the same reasons, worked well; just dont fantasise about that hot receptionist while youre waiting...boys. Saddle wise i kept the same one i started with, and still have on the old work bike. It was much better when the cover had fallen to pieces and i was sitting on pure shiny plastic: no friction, no place for bugs to grow,no staying wet in the rain.
    Failing this then seven kisses by seven virgins all around the ring should work if applied daily.
    Good luck and make sure you squeeze that seat zit before it gets infected and interesting.
  • And all this time no ones made a gay joke, I guess that leaves it up to me." If you drop your wallet outside of Mad Myrnas kick it all the way back to Spenard." If you were in Anchorage that would make sense and be funny almost in that sort of "I shouldn't be laughing tat this." way.
  • Carefull Kirk i use 2 be a male nurse but now one wresuls
  • "Good luck and make sure you squeeze that seat zit before it gets infected and interesting"

    I believe within this sentence can be found:

    at least 3 new rider names at the Sprint - see if you can spot them

    The marshall's parting comment as the last rider leaves a checkpoint at the next race

    As one hands one's equipment back to the Fleet department in any given company with a nod and a wink this phrase is uttered to wish you on your way.
  • I think there is four in there.
  • "Interesting,Interesting.Where now?"
    Interesting question.I'm not too familiar with my surroundings at this point but I'm sailing up a river on a boat muthafukka!
    "Come to the office,Interesting."
  • Damn. We would have so used that at OYB. Had a 'No Worries' at Megacycles. Switched to 'Worried' at certain times...
  • There is five as far as I can see. "squeeze" "seat zit" " infected" " squeeze" " zit squeeze" "interesting zit" "interesting zit" and so forth.
  • Ignore previous comment. "squeeze" "seat zit" " infected" " zit squeeze" "interesting " Zit intererest" "infected seat" yawn!
  • Pretty sure most of these were used at OYB or SD...
    Why's Bill keeping quiet about his "rub a banana skin inside your shorts" technique he used back then??
    Was anyone foolish enough to try it?

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