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  1.  
    Who has had a nasty crash and walked away to tell the tale? I remember about 8 years ago i got knocked off by a car that turned into a driveway as i rode along the inside of traffic on mortimer st. He didnt indicate and took the turn sharp as i was right along side him so i had nowhere to go. I came off and dislocated my shoulder. Some lady started screaming as he looked liked he was then trying to run me over whilst i was lying on the road. I managed to get my shoulder back in and quite shakin up. I got all his details but didn't really check. Turned out his address and license details were all fake. I went back to where it happened and to my amazement the driveway led into the Middx hospital, muppet. Another time i was going along the outside of traffic on farringdon st just before lights before the holborn via duct. I was going fast and this muppet pops a u-turn as im right next to him. No where to go bike goes out from under me and i landed head first on the road. Ambulance jobby and stitches in the face, cnut.

    Check this guy out

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jTDMfQkfmNU
    • CommentAuthortipper
    • CommentTimeDec 10th 2007
     
    i wanna buy both of them a drink
    • CommentAuthorifbm
    • CommentTimeDec 10th 2007
     
    Many years ago, I crashed head first into a bush whilst cycling very drunk in Feltham. I was extracted from the bush by two policemen, who walked me home while I ranted about my boyfriend (can't remember what he'd done). Then a few years ago knocked out a front tooth and smashed my face up after getting a loaf of bread caught in my front wheel. Learnt to never hang anything off my handlebars. Can't be bothered to go into the rest including a bin bag in Brewer st and the back of a car in New North rd.
    • CommentAuthorJP
    • CommentTimeDec 10th 2007
     
    Had loads, many stitches... The most memorable and least painful, actually painless was on Lee high rd Lewisham. Bombing down between kerb and line of stationary traffic at about 20 mph, car pulls out of side road directly in front of me, no time to stop, straight into the air, complete 360 flip and land in front of the car on my...Feet! Watch as the bike bounces off down the road, turn to the driver who doesnt seem to believe the ninja like action and went absolutley mental as the possible consequences sunk in... I couldnt believe id escaped unscathed. The forks were completely bent back...
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      CommentAuthorJosh
    • CommentTimeDec 10th 2007
     
    Had a good one today, brain was a bit frozen from spending most of my morning on my arse, car 2 ahead stops, one in front of me starts to go round it, I look over my shoulder quickly to do same, at this moment the guy in front of me slams on brakes. Blam. My bar end went straight through his back light, me over bars onto feet and knees not bad landing though, car took off at 60mph a split second after braking (maybe he hit the wrong pedal for a moment or something) so by the time I went over bars the car was gone. Had slightly numb fingers for a few minutes more from the cold than hitting the back of the car though. Best thing was the two jakeys shouting abuse and running after the car. Total damage to me and my bike one lost bar end plug.
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      CommentAuthorJosh
    • CommentTimeDec 10th 2007 edited
     
    But the best one I ever seen was Sea Mouse standing next to a back-windowless cab, wobbling slightly seconds after doing a superman impression through the back window, "go to the duke Seamus, don't hang around" so he did, right as rain after a couple of pints.
  2.  
    :cheer:
    :thumbup:
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      CommentAuthoroverdrive
    • CommentTimeDec 11th 2007 edited
     
    Next door to the alley-way at the back of the old metro building there's a cafe that once a week would throw out the old cooking oil into the gutter.You had to approach the alley in a straight line otherwise you'd end up on your arse.The sight and smell of Matty"Krusty"Raine as he entered the rider's room covered in rancid oil will stay with me forever.:crazy:
    • CommentAuthorsleepy
    • CommentTimeDec 11th 2007 edited
     
    some fucker got a pic of me after a particularly embarrassing one recently.

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      CommentAuthorzee
    • CommentTimeDec 12th 2007
     
    lots of crashes although none of those memorable apart from the fat old lady out of nowhere resulting in a hard landing on my jaw.. got an irresistible smile since :}

    i just love those deadly moments on the highway, just as much as i try to avoid them
    • CommentAuthorlurkette
    • CommentTimeDec 12th 2007
     
    i've been hit, but never in a fun(ny) way. :confused:

    best one i can think of was years ago in filthydelphia and my boy at the time was following me home (we were both pissed as farts). at some point i realised he was no longer with me, so i cycled back the way i came and found him having a hissy fit on the side of the road. he'd cycled into a stationary truck and cracked his (carbon) forks. :shocked:

    hmm, one time i was so drunk that i got lost in tottenham, phillip lane area, after falling off and losing my glasses. i don't believe i was hit by anything or cycled into anything. i think i just fell off. :shocked: fuck knows how i ended up in that neighbourhood either, as it was not on my way home...
  3.  
    It doesn't seem that Donny wants to get involved in the forum so i'll speak for him. He was fast, one of the fastest and known as "the don". Much before that though he was known as "crash test donny". When he started he was like a boy from the bush in a big city. He was crashing every week and i was worried he wasn't going to last for much longer. Like the time he lost it cruising down into high holborn and slid across the road into dumped rubbish. A more recent one was when he went into the back of a black cab totalling the back window and almost killing the passenger. It was lucky his head was made of rock and he had all that fat to brake his fall otherwise who knows...
    • CommentAuthorsleepy
    • CommentTimeDec 12th 2007
     
    "Much before that though he was known as "crash test donny""

    anyone remember chris test dummy? nutter used to go on and on about his heart stopping after he was doored on st martins le grand and had the edge of the door puncture his lung. impressive crash though. anyone who remembers my supercow smashup knows that was pretty clever :shades: but we'd all had a little bit too much polish breakfast so i don't think anyone can remember the exact details...

    had a great freak fixie induced front flip crossing oxford st, went to brake [skid], pulled out of my cleat and jammed my foot in between my front wheel and frame- weeeeeeeee! :surfing: splat :cry:
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      CommentAuthorjack
    • CommentTimeDec 13th 2007 edited
     
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i6vW4MXbdQk

    This is hard to believe.

    I imagine the guy has a rabbits foot in each pocket, a four leaf clover in his hat, never walks under ladders, messes with black cats or breaks mirrors. Of course, Catholics can always turn to the Madonna del Ghisallo, patron saint of cyclists.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Madonna_del_Ghisallo
    • CommentAuthorlurkette
    • CommentTimeDec 13th 2007
     
    that is bonkers! very lucky man.
  4.  
    What a fucking lucky bastard! Jesus wept!!! :shocked:
  5.  
    I had the pleasure of living with Crash Test Donny. Sometimes got home to find big D home early, usually with a buggered wheel (never lend him your spare), & occasionally bent forks as well.
    One memorable recount of how it happened i'll never forget. Riding up TCR he decided it would be a really clever & skillful feat to remove the coke can wedged between front wheel & frame by continuing to ride with a delicate ballet-like manoevre by gently kicking said offensive coke can loose.

    "next thing i knew i was lying upside down up the road with all these people looking at me man!"
    With broken wheel & bent forks obviously.

    What still makes me laugh & think of the Darwin awards is the fact that after a couple of redstripes he cautiously admitted that he ran over the coke can on purpose cos he was bored.
  6.  
    Something similar happened to me when i first started. Tried to kick a cup out of my wheel, and my foot got stuck in the wheel. A guy had to pull the bike while i pulled my foot out, it was that stuck. Very embarrassing.
  7.  
    I remember that story captain tiara and i know who you are. It made me remember the time i was having one of many races home to south london on a friday night with "crash test donny". We had just blasted through covent garden and i was leading along the strand. I took a tight gap through traffic and turned to go over waterloo bridge. I looked back but no donny. I turned and went back and found him lying on the ground at the front of the lights with a buckled front wheel. He had tried to follow me and the tight gap turned even tighter so much so that as he tried a D-train maneuver and all his weight had gone forward and literally destroyed the wheel and sent him flying i kid you not.
  8.  
    My memory is starting to come back about Donny. Another time i was riding behind him on oxford st. A good rule to follow along oxford st when approaching a blind spot is hit it only as fast as you can stop. "The don" is flying along along looking the goods as he go past a blind spot double decker and sure enough some poor woman walks out carrying a kebab. Donny's bike goes up in the air boom over the handlebars he goes bang down goes the woman lunch flying everywhere disaster. It doesn't end here Donny was sleeping on my couch after getting back from snowboarding all winter. It was getting late but "the don" hadn't returned. Late that night there was a knock and there is "crash test donny" on the doorstep looking like a wet weekend has blown over his face with a broken arm in a sling. Turned out he had narrowly avoided a kid running across in front of him and crashed out braking his hand.
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      CommentAuthorFarmer Joe
    • CommentTimeDec 13th 2007
     
    One time i was riding down wardour st the wrong way and a car was coming in the opposite direction. I had to jump the curb and then had to avoid a pedestrian so i had to drop back onto the road straight into a drain. The wheel went straight down the drain and i did a double sommersault over the handlebars and hit the deck. Bent front wheel and buckled pride. Then there was the time i was drunk cycling with dirty verne from scream. I hit a T-junction fast, saw a bus flying straight at me, panicked and jumped off the bike into a gutter. The bike collapsed to the side. Muppet!! Lastly my first ever alleycat i was on a girls ralleigh bike. I was racing to the finish line against my shadow for 3rd last on the wrong side of the road and crashed into a cylclist (darryl chandler) as he tried his hardest to avoid me. I flipped over the handlbars destroyed the bike and darryl had to get stitches in his arm. He has never spoken to me since.
  9.  
    Actually Zak, he ran the kid over.