Posted this on another forum, thought I'd share it here..
Looks like this week is the antithesis of last week. Had an absolutely hench dump before work and thought that'd be me done and dusted for the day. About two hours later and my ringpiece starts puckering hardcore, proper defcon moment. About half an hour passes 'til I find an office block that doesn't have locked bogs but I see a mateyboy bop in there and this is not going to be suitable for a public audience. So I'm milling about trying not to be too bait and after 10 minutes he's still in there so I thought 'Sorry mate but I NEED to go'. I get in there and settle down and try and let it out in a controlled manner, the first slight release and man lets rip like a fucking victory fanfare swiftly followed by the sound of a barrel of porridge being poured into a bigger barrel of water in one go, there's still bare ammo left inthe clip and I've already unleashed carnage :-/ I attempt a few more 'controlled' releases and it really ain't happening tbh and by now I'm getting frustrated 'cos mateyboy's been in here a good 20 minutes now so I think fuck it let loose the cannons and did the human equivalent of a fuel dump, one time, I'm surprised the bowl withstood the barrage tbh and by now I've lost all dignity so I'm letting out groans too. And then, at the end, one of the finest awkward silences I've ever experienced