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Control Box: Living in fear

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  1.  
    • CommentAuthorNIK
    • CommentTimeMay 1st 2009
     
    I dont know about anyone else, but recently i've been living in fear of all motorists. I worry that one will knock me off just for the hell of it, because I'm a cyclist. Or that classic 'I didn't see you', or I'll get beaten up, again, just for being a cyclist and daring to be on the road. This is despite for the past year I've calmed my riding style down a lot, to the point where I dont even shoot the lights anymore. This was the first winter I've ever had lights on at night. I've nearly become a responsible cyclist.

    However, every time I get on my bike I worry it'll be the last time, or that i'm pushing my luck and just asking to wake up in hospital bed in massive pain. I've given up training in the countryside becasue I worry that if something happens there I wont be found till it's too late. The only riding I do know is the short 2 miles to my uni or 1 mile to town and I freak every time I hear a car behind me and panic until it goes past, only for it happen again when the next one comes into earshot.

    Recently I've been gettin more and more abuse from motorists, nearly every journey I make there is some kind of incident, such as today, when a car full of twats pulled up along side and one of the passengers started shouting abuse then it came right up along side me and he grabbed me trying to shake me to the ground. Needless to say I was pretty shook up and still have no idea why this took place.

    Its gotten so bad its started affecting my sleep, I have the same recurring dream of a white van man stabbing me (this nearly happened about two years ago) which up until recently I never thought about.

    I'm seriously thinking about quitting cycling for good, however, before I hang up my cycling shoes, I was wondering if anyone had any ideas on what to do to make this stop? Or if this has happened to anyone else?

    Cheers
    Nik
    • CommentAuthorsleepy
    • CommentTimeMay 1st 2009
     
    are you still in shottingham?

    i've had "the fear", that feeling that something awful was going to happen and that i would be scraped off the road that afternoon. that was mainly due to filthy rugs though.

    sorry to hear you're being victimised, it's a pretty horrid experience and not something i'd ever wish on anyone.

    /goodcop

    i have ridden with you and drunk with you and while you seem like a decent feller you do like to attract attention. you're loud, fucking huge and seem to enjoy showing off those hyowge biceps. i'd think most of the nasty drivers see an opportunity to get one over on someone who they'd probably apologise profusely to if they spilled your pint in a pub IYSWIM :wink:

    sleepy's advice: don't give up the bike, ditch the sleeveless t shirts, don't live in fear*

    *just realised something: do you use a lock holster? having 3kg of hardened steel to hand can come in handy and having it on show may act as a deterrent**.

    **or you might just get shot.
    • CommentAuthorNIK
    • CommentTimeMay 1st 2009
     
    Lol yeah i'm still there, Cheers for the advice.
    i keep my lock in my bag cos I used to scrape my legs on holster when i had one. ditchin the sleevlessness may be hard in summer, but i'll give it a go. To be honest i'll give anything ago.
    •  
      CommentAuthoroverdrive
    • CommentTimeMay 1st 2009
     
    HTFU
  5.  
    Yeah, I have had the fear as well - for about 2 years after some cunt broke my ankle. It does get better.
  6.  
    I know exactly how you feel nick - occasionally have moments where I think "I must be mad, why the fuck do I risk my life like this every day, all it would take is one mistake for me to end up paralysed or dead" and have had fearful motorist dreams. The worst was dreaming that I was sat outside a cafe drinking a coffee. Motorist beeped at another motorist for cutting him up, both stopped at the lights outside the cafe where i was sat. The one who cut the other up calmly got out of the car, pulled out a pistol and shot the guy who beeped in the chest. For no other reason than for beeping his horn. That was fucking scary and very realistic.

    The solution? Move to Amsterdam. Or go on a Guerilla car arson spree every evening, it'll make yuo feel better.
  7.  
    or get a gun
    •  
      CommentAuthorPapa44
    • CommentTimeMay 6th 2009
     
    when i was couriering i had the fear for a few weeks after my big accident, getting sideswiped at 40mph by a stolen car on the wrong side of the road. it seemed to pass but as soon as i bought the misses a bike i've been suffering it hugely. can't let her out the house before giving her the lorry lecture...

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