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Twenty-odd Questions - Walshy
17.06.11 by Dazzler

How old are you? 33

Where were you born? Canberra, Australia.

How long have you been a courier? Since 2002 although I only get out on the road once or twice a month these days.

Hang Name? Walshy. Actually, I did work at Creative Couriers for 1 week when I first arrived in London and they gave me rider number 44.

Who do you ride for? Myself.

What was your first bike? The first bike I remember was a yellow BMX which Mum & Dad gave me when I was 4 or 5. I learnt how to pop a mono on that thing!_

What do you ride now?_ My current bike is a bubblegum blue fixie. It’s made of steel and is kinda slow but it’s a modern bike. I love compatible components. I hate retro. Never liked vintage. Can’t stand polished lugs. Brooks saddles are ugly. Cages are dumb. Straight forks rule!

What’s the best docket you’ve ever been given? A few years ago I delivered a package to Paris, but, probably the best docket I’ve ever had was late last year. One-up to Doha, Qatar. Cleared about £200.

What’s the worst thing about being a courier? Down time is by far the worst aspect of a bike couriers day. Sitting around waiting for a job is a killer. Too much time to think about how much money you’re not earning.

What’s the best thing about being a courier? There are 2 great things about being a courier. Firstly, the community. The streets are our office and every bike courier is your colleague even if you work at different companies. The second great thing is the fitness. You ride all week then hammer yourself on the weekends knowing all too well that after a few detoxing runs to E14 on Monday morning you’ll be like new.

Describe your childhood in 3 words. Sunny, safe, fun. That’s Canberra for ya.

What is your earliest memory? Cutting my knee open on an escalator in Sydney. Blood everywhere. My family were going to a Lego show and I got excited and ran up the escalator and mis-timed one of the steps. I was about 4 or 5. I’ve still got the scare on me knee.

What’s on your music player? Mostly punk rock, a little bit of metal & the best-of the Travelling Willburys.

What’s the best piece of clothing/equipment you carry? Definitely my Pac Bag. Nah, actually, I’ve got an Abus lock that I’ve had for 9 years and I’ve never had a bike stolen. That’s some quality kit right there!

What advice would you give to any wannabe couriers? Do people really go through a faze of ‘wanting to be a courier’? For those who think there’s some sort of secret process, this is what I did. Sort a bike, roll up to some London courier company in Berwick Street, knock on their door then lie about working in Sydney as a courier. Too many people are scared of jumping in the deep end.

What’s the best lunch deal in town? It used to be the Easton Street WC1 sandwich shop. It was a depot for those guys and girls that deliver sandwiches on bikes. At 2pm they’d start selling off the un-sold goods for cheap. I’m a massive sweet tooth and they’d sell their pastries for 10p each! When I was skint I’d feed myself on £1 a day.

What’s the best chat-up line you’ve ever given to/received by a receptionist? Once upon a time a fanciable young lass told me that I should get off my bike and let someone else do the riding…

Favourite place to stand by? Definitely the corner of Poland and Broadwick. Old school. I saw Homer there the other day. Represent!

What made you become a courier? Not what. Who? Zac Speedfast got me into it. I hear he’s a bender now days.

In a parallel universe you would be… The guy on the other side of the mirror.

What one thing would improve the quality of your life? Backside smith grinds.

Who’d play you in the film of your life? Dunno, but Jed would definitely expect Woody Harrelson to do it.

What would be your catchphrase? Hello, Scream!

It’s the dream dinner party – what 5 guests are there? The Queen. My sister. The guy down the skatepark who always says g’day but I don’t know his name. My old Landlord even though I’ve never met him and don’t know what he looks like. Kurt Russell. My dreams are weird, hey!

What has your been your proudest moment/greatest achievement? My band, The Electric Cocks, have just had a split-single released on vinyl by Spanish record label, Bowery Records. It’s my first ever release.

If you could go back and edit the past is there anything you would change? Back to the Future was a cool movie but, The Butterfly Effect scares me.

What’s the worst job you’ve ever done? O’Neill’s, New Row, Covent Garden.

What is the most important lesson life has taught you? Mass x velocity = momentum. I don’t condone drink-riding but… The faster you go, the easier it is!

How would you like to be remembered? As a punk rocker.

When were you happiest? Dumb question. I’m happy most of the time.

What would your superpower be? It’d be awesome to be able to twitch my nose and instantly have the whole flat cleaned. Just like Bewitched.

Freedom is… Saturday morning.

You have a time machine – where would you go? I’d go to the Roundhouse in London on the 4th of July, 1976. Google it you indie know-nothin’s!

You are allowed to pass one new law – what is it? I’d restrict commuters from riding to work between the hours of 7am-10am and 5pm-7pm (for their own safety of course… hold on. I am a commuter).

How do you relax? I play my guitar.

Tell us something about yourself we would never guess. I used to play Australian Rules Football semi-professionally.

You’ve got one youtube link – what is it? This! Me and Seb organised this race. Read about it here

Tell us a joke. Why do girls wear make up and perfume? ‘Cause they’re ugly and they stink. Suck on that one all you politically-correct, hippie types.

  1. A job is waiting for you on the pipes…

    — Zack Speedfast    17 June 2011, 09:20    #
  2. Don’t be a bender,Walshy!

    — overdrive    17 June 2011, 12:47    #
  3. bumped into pretty boy the other day he sends his love .Hey walshy did you move 2 melbourne to follow your footy career?up the pies .ive heard canberras a bit boring nice parks no place 4 a punk rocker

    — curly    6 July 2011, 01:43    #
  4. and great skills in that video showed it to my wife she was scared shitless but she got a flavour she thought the music was crap

    — curly    6 July 2011, 02:02    #
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