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Twenty-odd Questions - Selim
13.04.11 by Dazzler

How old are you? 36

Where were you born? Gdansk, Poland.

How long have you been a courier? 10 years as a cycle courier, but in 1998/99 I worked as a runner for a photo agency in Warsaw. Duties were pretty much the same as being a courier: deliveries and collections. The mode of transport was different tho. Anyway, decide yourself: 10 or 13 years

Hang Name? Selimski

Who do you ride for? Creative. And I stand by for them too…

What was your first bike? First bike ever was probably a Polish ‘folder’ Wigry 3. My first courier bike was a Univega mtb

What do you ride now? A no-name Reynolds 531 road bike made before words ‘bicycle’ and ‘lightweight’ were used together.

What’s the best docket you’ve ever been given? Has not happened yet. The best docket shall be paying enough for my sweat. At least 80% of the client price.

What’s the worst thing about being a courier? That would be a lengthy list. Here are few things off top of my head: lack of trade unions, crap and inconsiderate controlling, amount of road rage one has to deal with and the knowledge that couriering as a profession that guarantees any kind of security is a road to nowhere.

What’s the best thing about being a courier? Riding bikes.

Who are your heroes? Doctors Without Borders

What’s on your music player? Today’s playlist: Sedition, Mr. Lif, HisHeroIsGone, The Mob, Jeffrey Lewis, Black Sabbath, Nausea, Hasan Salaam, Crisis, Aus-Rotten, UFO, 5 2 Debiec, Dead Prez, Crucifix, The Devil Makes Three, Los Crudos.

What’s the best piece of clothing/equipment you carry? A Kryptonite chain. Outlived about 5 other locks.

What advice would you give to any wannabe couriers? You’ll need nerves of steel. Functioning bike, a strong lock and decent waterproofs can help.

What’s the best lunch deal in town? I’m a gluten free vegetarian/border line vegan so its doubtful many reading this will need my advice.

Favourite place to stand by? A warm and dry one in winter and shaded one with lots of drinkable water in summer.

What one thing would improve the quality of your life? Enough of financial resources so I would not need to slave myself for peanuts.

You have a time machine – where would you go? Pre-‘discovery’ Australia

You are allowed to pass one new law – what is it? Ban on corporate involvements in politics.

You’ve got one youtube link – what is it? This

Tell us a joke. George W. Bush arrives at St. Peter’s Gate.
St. Peter greets him and then asks an unexpected question: “Would you rather go to heaven or hell?”
W. looks puzzled. He didn’t realize he had a choice.
“I’ll tell you what I’ll do for you,” St. Peter says, “I’ll give you a day in each place and then you can decide.”
W. takes him up on the offer.
The first day in hell. W. is amazed. It may be a bit stark, but it’s not bad at all. His old friends Cheney and Rumsfeld are here… He has a wonderful time reminiscing with them.
Then he is returned to St. Peter.
The next day is in heaven.
There is no denying heaven is a beautiful place, a true paradise. But W. is bored. He sees no one he knows, and scenery doesn’t amount to much in the absence of fellowship.
He wanders around for a day before he finds himself back at the pearly gate.
He chooses hell.
On his arrival back below he sees devils roasting screaming people on spits, fire spouting everywhere.
“But it wasn’t like this before!” he screams.
Glancing up, one of the devils says, “That was the campaign. This is the real thing.”

Selim has a collection of his excellent photographs on his website.

  1. Jesus,mate.Cheer up FFS!

    — overdrive    13 April 2011, 09:27    #
  2. Stop whingeing John, or I’ll send you back to soho street

    — selim    13 April 2011, 09:42    #
  3. Great post, but I agree you should cheer up.

    Sameday Couriers Birmingham    3 May 2011, 11:35    #
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