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Muppet of the Month - April 2008
9.04.08 by Buffalo Bill

I don’t normally pick on other cyclists. Each to his own. If someone wants to wear hideous tennis socks, matched with balloon basket-ball trainers, then so be it, let them be, say I. And if someone else wants to ride a 650c front wheel pursuit frame with drops, then go right ahead. As long as I don’t have to pay to get their neck straightened out. And in any case, BikesnobNYC does ridicule of current cycle fashion much better than anyone else.

But this bike, seen in Central London at the weekend, is so stupid that I feel obliged to say something, as a public service. Observe the lack of front brake. Remark upon the freewheel. Goggle at the slack cabling, which must reduce the already ineffectual stopping power of the brake. Suicide brake, indeed.

Question the use of lo-pros. In what situation could the rider ever put their hands on the horns? No way of controlling the speed of the machine from there, is there? And clearly the tape on the horns is just a waste of cork.

The hand-painted lug-liner is a very nice touch, I am sure you will all agree.

  1. Every BMX I’ve ever ridden has had a freewheel and a rear brake. Isn’t that the norm for ‘dirt’ BMX?? I’ve never had a problem/


    Jon    9 April 2008, 12:07    #
  2. When I went to the Washington CMWC I noticed that a lot of the couriers only had a back breaks on their MTB’s. Still not for me though.


    caspar    9 April 2008, 17:17    #
  3. yes jon most bmxers have a rear brake only, this is because front wheel tricks went out of fashion in the 90’s. but then you get idiots doing footjam nosepicks, “look how awesome i am, i can balance on my front wheel despite the fact that i have no front brake”…lame. if you want to do front wheel tricks, why not just get a front brake for fucks sake…. fucking posers the lot of them.

    also, if you only had a front brake, you’d probably end up going over the bars a lot. bmxers with just rear brakes cannot stop as quickly as bmxers with 2 brakes. try emergency stopping in wet weather on a freewheel bike with just a rear brake, and compare that to a bike with 2 brakes (either fixed + front brake or freewheel with front & rear handbrakes)….


    — messenger of doom    9 April 2008, 21:18    #
  4. also, the quick-release rear wheel in forward facing dropouts is another formula for trouble….


    — croth    10 April 2008, 06:03    #
  5. ????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????


    — redrum    10 April 2008, 06:34    #
  6. Of course, back in the late-80s, you’d all have been riding Muddy Fox ATBs – probably with discs on the rear wheel…..and you’d have thought that was really cool.


    — Count Basie    10 April 2008, 08:47    #
  7. no, i was riding a raleigh burner, then a bannana


    — josh    10 April 2008, 08:53    #
  8. Actually, I wanted a Muddy Fox Courier (see this article and this one) but all I could afford was a Raleigh Maverick!


    — Bill    10 April 2008, 09:04    #
  9. @c basie
    C’mon man nothing was cool in the late 80’s


    — overdrive    10 April 2008, 11:25    #
  10. Well, you and I were young, so it can’t have been all bad, can it?


    — Bill    10 April 2008, 11:51    #
  11. I only count 20 wrap-arounds of bar tape on his bullhorns when everybody who knows knows it should be at least 21 and no more than 23. Also if you notice his seat is about 1/3 degree off-centre – what a tit. And if you look closely you can see a little bit of shit on the kerb. Fo’ sho.


    — Jesus Christ    10 April 2008, 13:47    #
  12. You got a problem with my bike??


    — Fakenger    11 April 2008, 09:05    #
  13. your right, running a bike like this in London is madness


    — UltraViolet    13 April 2008, 10:59    #
  14. freehub could have been welded up to make a fixed? Or maybe it’s a honeypot to get some theiving b4st4rds


    — The King    25 April 2008, 09:29    #
  15. josh riding a raleign burner then the banana? that was my own ombo of kid bikes. i swear the old man put a fixed cog on the burner, it feels so natural to be back to it, and i recsll quarelling with the kids at school who said you don’t have to pedal downhill.


    — Rude Boy    5 December 2009, 21:01    #
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